Originally posted on DudleyDanes.com 08/14/2023
If you’ve been reading my Dansian Disquisitions for a while now, you’ve no doubt noticed that I avoid basic Word of the Day-esque summaries. I know I’ve mentioned this before because my focus (as well as my interest) is on more than definitions to uncommon words.
Still, I will sometimes explore words that also appear on those Word of the Day lists. It makes sense—I am an admirer of all words bold and beautiful.
Paraprosdokian is certainly one such word. It is bold. It is beautiful. It is underused and underappreciated. So much so, that my computer insists on underlining it in red.
What I’m saying is that you can see the magic of today’s wonderful word however you like. Word of the Day? Fine. Sure. But know this: Parasprosdokian isn’t just some antiquated dinosaur best left behind. It is alive and well; it is functional; it is a word that you will want to remember and use in conversation, in practice, or at the very least, as a cool factoid to impress your friends.
Paraprosdokian (pair-uh-prahz-DOHK-ee-in): n. A literary device using wordplay in which the final part of a phrase or sentence is unexpected. Often used for comedic effect. (from LiteraryDevices.net)
- Jerry ate my orange–now I have one less crayon.
- I need to make a trip to the store but I’m out of bread.
- I phoned my wife to say I was sorry. She said, “Good call.”
- I drew a smile on my lamp; it really brightens up the room.
Consider “paraprosdokians” to be the scholarly word for one-liners and dad jokes. They are witty turns of phrase that generally employ puns for punchlines, and they frequently result in what may be the highest form of flattery: the eye-roll.
Better still, paraprosdokians are fun to create. They’re easier than poems, funnier than puns, and when successful, they offer real satisfaction.
- Peter rode horseback, but what he rode on the way up, I don’t know.
- I once sang for a choir. They shushed me.
- If you were to walk a mile in my shoes, I’d have difficulty chasing you down.
- When the repairman finished with my air conditioner he said, “You’re cool now.”
Despite the IAN at the conclusion of the word, paraprosdokian is, in fact, a noun. This means that if it is ever used as an adjective, it can and should be written “Paraprosdokianian,” making the word itself a perfect example of its definition.
As many of our good words do, this one comes from Greek. It consists of two roots, “para” and “prosdokia,” which translates to “beyond understanding.” It’s a fitting name, since paraprosdokians fly high above many people’s heads.
If you’re wondering whether we got “doky” from “dokian,” you’re way out of your lane. Leave the etymologizing to me, will you?
- I always receive happy endings when I go to the barber. With every hair wash I get a free blow job.
- Everyone who knows me knows I drink a lot of beer. Everyone who doesn’t know me can fuck off and get me another beer.
The batteries in my garage door opener stopped working and now it’s a garage door pointer.
I have the ability to travel forward in time. The further the jump, the longer it takes to get there.
Though dads everywhere overuse paraprosdokians in a manner that says “I want to be murdered in my sleep,“ history has proven that true masters of the form can find success. Groucho Marx, Mitch Hedberg, Rodney Dangerfield, and Stephen Wright are just a handful of those who built careers on these quick turns of phrase.
There are also those who managed to find success through other means but employed paraprosdokians so eloquently that they’ve entered into a sort of Quote-Worthiness Hall of Fame. Winston Churchill, Yogi Berra, Dorothy Parker, Mark Twain, and Mae West stand among this crowd.
At the other end of that spectrum, there are also those who sully the paraprosdokianian mystique and ignore the suffering it creates for the rest of us. No, I’m not disparaging dads again. This time I’m looking right at TV newscasters. You all really need to cut it out.
